The past few days have been really good except for being too aware of my belly. It feels and looks so big. I have been comparing a lot and putting my self worth on the size of my waist. I haven't restricted, though the desire is there. It is so strange how I can post about not wanting to take action toward my insecurities one day and the next write about wanting to starve myself. But then again, nothing with eating disorders make sense. I know rationally my tummy is not that big, and that it is a normal, healthy sized stomach, but since it does not have defined abs...that means it is fat an unattractive. I am doing the best I can do at taking care of myself and getting done what needs to get done. The worst thing I can do right now is give ED more attention.
Stay Strong and Beautiful! <3
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