Today was a really good day. I slept in with my babies and got some errands finished before work. Work was really fun. It has been a while since I worked so it was really fun seeing all my kids again. A lot of the babies moved into the toddler room! It is so neat to watch them grow up. Just a little while ago I reread my old journal. The entries went back before rehab, when I was really engaged in my eating disorder. It was really tough to read and relive the moments. As I read, I could feel ED taking over. It felt like a heaviness in my chest and a lump in my throat. Reading those tough times before and during treatment just made it very clear to me how far I have come in the past three years. My two year anniversary of my recovery is coming up this week. I am so proud of myself. It will have been exactly two years since I have purposely made myself sick. That is a huge milestone for me, especially after reading the about what a dark place I was in three years ago. I am feeling very proud of myself, blessed for having overcome this disease and also very vulnerable for having read what I went through in more detail. I could tell you what happened to me in a nut shell, like I did in an earlier post, but to read the details from when I wrote them in the moment, are much more hard to swallow. I know I will bounce back, but right now I am feeling some uncomfortable emotions.
Stay Strong and Beautiful! <3
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